Normally I know exactly what I’m going to write about, but today is different. There’s a lot I’ve been thinking about lately (that’s always a given) and there is so much that has happened. To me it doesn’t even seem like Summer. I guess here in California it can almost always pass as one season. Although I have been working an ample amount and I haven’t really stopped to notice the time gone by. Well until now that is. I’ll tell you what though, I’m learning A LOT.
Life is interesting. It happens so fast.
There are times when we can feel so lost. And that’s okay. At this age, or maybe at any given time, we seem to be in constant search of something. Sometimes we don’t even know what that is.
The question is: How do we allow this to happen without it driving us completely insane?
Well we let it happen, and we learn to accept the uncertainty of never really knowing. Trusting that one day it will all make sense.
In the meantime, how is it that we entertain ourselves in order to distract from the frustration of wanting to figure everything out?
Well I’ll tell you what I do…
I got to the point of being completely over exhausted and burnt out beyond belief. Basically I wanted to give up all together on my own game of searching and then I remembered: none of it really matters! Life is just going to happen anyway.
In order for me to forget about all of the craziness, I began to allow people to effect me. By this I do not mean that I am changing who I truly am as a person; simply I am allowing myself to do things I normally wouldn’t do.
Someone once told me you should do something every day that scares you. You should try it.
I’m still working on this one, but let me tell you it is rather exhilarating.
For example, an individual came into my life who truly made me LIVE. I mean really…. I felt as if I had no choice but to experience the things they were presenting to me. Activities I was literally afraid of, I was all of the sudden facing full force and with a smile. All in all, I was finally allowing myself to have a bit of fun. I guess I don’t actually have to be a complete workaholic one hundred percent of the time. Let’s face it, I’ve tried it, and look where I ended up. Everyone’s life needs a bit of balance, and you just have to know when enough is enough before it’s too late.
So now I’ve become completely obsessed with this kind of living. Oh and it can be the smallest bit of scariness as well. I mean i’m not saying I’m going to go base jump anytime soon. It’s just that I was in desperate need of some change. For one I was able to relax and recharge, while eventually I just became more open to everything around me.
Let me say that I also learned how to say no, when the time was appropriate. There’s a point where I have to know what’s good for me and I can’t always be a ‘yes man,’ to everything.
This is what I’ve been fixated with of late:
Outings with friends. I live for these moments.
Drives in the car, top down, singing karaoke. Yes the three hour traffic ride counts.
Beach days and hiking. This means actually getting in the water.
New findings: restaurants and coffee shops.
Plans with the girls. Evenings with the guys.
Stylized taverns and pubs. Home renovating ideas!
Long talks. Silliness.
Dancing without thinking.
Getting to know knew people and understanding who they really are.
This may very well be what I will be posting about to come. New new new. Newness. Nevertheless it’ll always be about my discoveries, deeply or simply. I like learning about people; it teaches me about myself. Dance and the creation station are always something I will be engrossed by, even when I am frustrated by it. Dating is something I may never understand and I’m learning to let go of that. Friends are what I am learning to cherish. I know that I don’t have to be so strong all of the time or expect to do everything on my own. Ultimately it’s okay to be a little lost. Good can only come out of this, and it is a natural human thing to not always know or understand things.
I can only be grateful for the confusing times, the frustrating times and when I feel the most disoriented. There is such thing as being a beautiful mess and only this leads to self-discovery.
‘ I like people who have a sense of individuality. I love expression and anything awkward and imperfect, because that’s natural and that’s real. ‘ ❤
Tell me something interesting. Surprise me. Make me do something crazy. Quit the small talk. Really get me thinking. Oh yea, and don’t forget to #LiveLikeEric :
Until next time. I promise I won’t be gone for long 😉